3/13/10

just like a wavin' flag

Canada took it upon themselves to Remix “Wavin Flag” a song by K'naan. All in support for everything happening in Haiti. You know it's pretty much Canada's take on “We Are the world”. It features many Canadian artists like Drake, Avril Lavigne, Justin Bieber, Fefe Dobsin, Nelly Furtado and alot more. I'm in love with it.. I really believe they did an amazing job.

3/8/10

five months in :]


147 / 365 *
21/365 *

148 / 365 *
20/365 *

147 / 365 *
21/365 *

148 / 365 *
20/365 *

149 / 365 *
21/365 *

150 / 365 *
21/365 *

151 / 365 *
21/365 *


i can't believe it cause time has passed by so quickly but i'm already 5 months into 365!

5 MONTHS!!!!




*** ps, my boyfriend is so NOT my biggest fan! *sigh*

3/7/10

chicks get hammmmeereedd !

+ vodka & coolers mixed.
+ 8PM – 6AM drinking.
+ cheeseburgers.
+ laundry room peeking.
+ drunk driving.
+ pulled over but good to go.
+ sisters cupcakin.
+ non-stop jokes.
+ drunk strangers
+ 5AM mc donalds bathroom runs.
+ free disgusting coffee.
+ piercings.
+ SERIOUS CUPCAKIN!
+ and crashing.

oh & this :]

a quick quick quickie ;)

Although life is real messy right now and its about to get busy & dramatic! I did take the weekend out to actually have a lot of fun. Ill get to that later in the post. BUT lets just say Monday i'm officially back to work! SEMI-WORK. Actually because I'm on a medical leave it is time off with pay but I just feel so worthless.. like I'm doing NOTHING! Which in my eyes makes me worse lol. I just always have to be doing something or else I'd feel like a bum! But anyways Monday I'm starting to work from home hopefully it goes good. I know it'll be harder but easy at the same time being its from the comfort of my bedroom ahha. Emails & calls is what I'll be doing. Its weird but I actually miss work :/ EKKK! :( it is a good thing that I'm not surrounded by all that negativity right no especially cause we all damn sure know that I don't need no more negative shit in my life!

ANYWAYS!! just thought I'd update the world on the fact that I'm actually about to be doing something instead of sitting on my ass getting fat lol literally! OHHH! And I got a new piercing :) man this weekend was a good one.. but the post with all the pictures + excitement will come... later ;)

I do wanna say thank you so much to LALA for taking the time to sit and talk with me in a moment were I thought I would lose my mind! This girl is simply amazing! I'm glad the fact we have our blog together now is bringing us closer.. because it's got me opening up and seeing a whole different side of an amazing person. Ty babe :)! OHHHH and She's currently doing a “Love Your Body Month” which is completely inspiring and amazing. She has a way to reach you and touch your damn soul! She just an overall amazing person who deserves nothing but the best! ♥ Be sure if you aren't following her to go right ahead and do that ! and also take a look and follow TORONTO, CALIFORNIA ( our baby ) hehe.

http://simplestformofanelle.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com

3/4/10

basically i've fallen apart..

Recently lifes been throwing me nothing but fire balls. In the past week I experienced one of the worst things someone could ever face... ONCE AGAIN. And I can stand here saying i'm completely tired although I know that wont put it to an end. No matter what I do im in a lose lose. All alone.. like always. I have to somehow find positivity in me.. deep down because i'm gonna need it just to hold on.

But moving on to even worse news. My uncles ( you know the ones thats been in the hospital ) well the doctors let us know that they're giving him 3 months to live. Yes I know that people outlive it by a life time.. months.. weeks.. days. Its just the thought that a doctor put a time limit on his life.. isnt life worth so much more? Im torn apart.

Anyways BRI'S idea to have a banner link to everyone's page is amazing. Yes bri I completed the task and made 3 different ones :) ( there will be more.. trust me ). but for now if you follow.. love or support my blog link this on your blog & direct me to yours so I can add you to my bar :]















3/2/10

toronto, california !


^ CLIIIIIIICCKKKKK THE IMAGEEEE ^

The amazing LALA! Came to me with a project she had in mind of us doing and I just couldnt refuse. Being that she lives in California and I live in Toronto we started this project that requires us to take 1 image per week and blend them into one diptych! It's an amazing proect and we just kicke dit off today with Week 1! im so ready to get deep in this. So check us out, follow us, comment us, link us, LOVE US! <3

http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com
http://torontocaliforniaproject.blogspot.com

2/28/10

at the end of night, i just want us to be alright


138 / 365 *
21/365 *
pretty much speaks for itself ;)

139 / 365 *
20/365 *
ITTY! my babygirl. she's the sweetest babe around.. trust me

140 / 365 *
21/365 *
stop in the name of loveeeeeee !

141 / 365 *
20/365 *
love !

142 / 365 *
21/365 *
kiara! she made about 30 angels that day.. maybe even more!

143 / 365 *
21/365 *
apple crumble! so deelish.

144 / 365 *
21/365 *
bwahah mouring their fallen eaten soldier :]

beautiful girl with your beautiful smile

Rules:
1. Open your first photo folder
2. Scroll to the 10th photo
3. Post that photo and the story behind it
4. Tag 5 or more people


This pictures from the other night actually. Because jade is a little terrorist we had to wait for her to fall asleep to go to the park. But I did promise i would take her so around 8PM we finally got a chance to go and although we weren't there for long because it was FREEZING! She had the best time. Like how can you not smile looking at this?

Kiara! My baby aka my MINI ME! This girl has had such a big influence on me and the way I do things. She may be only 6 years old but she's a person who will do whatever it takes to put a smile on your face.. NO MATTER WHAT! Shes way beyond her years. When she was born my sister still lived at home so Kiara was always around me.. always wanting me. The bond we have is completely unbreakable. If only she could understand the effect she has on me and just how much she truly means to me. She brings everything back to me.. the games.. all the fun. I mean yeah playing hide and seek for almost 2 hours can get tiring but seeing the smile on her face makes it all worth it. If only she knew. I love you KIARA!

( i tag anyone who reads this )

weekend recap!!!!!!!!

This weekend turned out to be pretty drama filled! What else is new? Starting off Thursday me & Steph went to do some grocery shopping and my sister randomly ended up being there! She dropped us home and proceeded to go get the kids from daycare & after school program. Well the first turn she made on the road she ended up running over something metal that punctured her tire and it began smoking and all that. They've been doing a lot of construction on the road and DONT ever clean up how they should. Here she is having to do a run around because its 5:15 by down and both kids have to be picked up by 6! I ended up getting Kiara and she got jade but its just crazy that shit like this ALWAYS and I mean always happens to her. I really don't know if shes jinxed but in ever situation she comes out with the short stick. SMH!

Friday me & Steph were hanging out drinking. The whole night she was hinting that she wanted to go out and the type of person Steph is she wont stop until you cave or until she can see you're irritated! Anyways as the night went on she kept talking to her one friends Courtney ( it was her birthday ) Of course me I wasn't gonna go regardless simply because I don't know Courtney OR her friends. I tend to enjoy avoiding awkward situations. ANYWAYS what I said to her was “you can go if you want.. but I'm not going” She followed that up with “you're my best friend I wouldn't leave you” I bet you can guess that she went right? YUP! I wasn't mad that she went either but I think its pretty fucked up on her whole friend part..especially considering she just said she wouldn't! But karma comes around and she ends up walking in sick as hell. She went and puked all over so she wanted to come back. BWAH! After that the night turned messy so MOVING ON!

Saturday went something like this.. I wanted to go somewhere to have dinner so I was telling my mom that we need to go out especially since we haven't been for the longest while. I wasn't to go to Swiss Chalet which is like a home style rotisserie & grill place. Anyways randomly Steph calls and wants to go to the exact same place and considering my mom & Steph's moms are friends we kinda made it a outing. It was our first time doing something like that and it was real relaxing and nice :) mos def something were planning on doing again. I got the garlic loaf appetizer that I shared with like everyone! I for the first time got the ribs too they were actually REALLY good! Even though I'm not a rib person.. oh and of course I got fries but made them a poutine :] mmmm.. It was real good and way too filling!




nom nom nom !!!


But of course the drama has to come in right? So my older brother has been staying with me because of problems with his girlfriend. The relationship I have with him is weird I mean he kinda lives in his own world. I wont hear from him for months and then randomly talk to him everyday... its weird! But anyways! My brother has always had a problem with my sisters boyfriend which makes no sense but we think its jealously? IDK? And my sisters always had a problem with my brothers girlfriend which makes sense because shes a snakeISH shit talking two faced bitch LOL. ANYWAYS when it comes to family gatherings my brothers girlfriend ALWAYS has to come ( why? We still don't know ) especially since shes always a bitch and annoying. My sisters boyfriend never comes out of respect ( and doesn't want unnecessary drama to pop off ). So regardless it's not fair to my sister or her boyfriend. My sister and brother got in a HUGE argument yesterday because my brother finally came out and admitted that he doesn't like her boyfriend but has no valid reasons in a twist my sister attacked him about his girlfriend and of course it turned ugly. I'm with my sister 100% though on this. His girlfriend has changed him so much ( and pulled him away on purpose.. spiteful bitch ) that he doesn't even know how to defend her because even he knows whatever my sister was saying is right.. he just wont admit to it. Especially since my brothers the type that's right even when hes wrong. AHHHH this is gonna carry on for days :(

2/26/10

i'm leaving msgs & voicemail's telling you i miss you.. baby am i doing too much?

As bad as it sounds i've always been the girl people hated. More so for what I had and what I always got.. literally if I wanted something I would get it. For example if there was a boy I was feeling i'd get him in a fucking second.. literally. If I want that purse or those shoes .. I got it. Just like that! I never once had to do the whole “chase me dance” with someone. I just knew that once dude knew I was feeling him he'd be weak for me. I'm not tryna sound all cocky or shit but it was just that easy. UNTIL my boyfriend of course. His nonchalant attitude for my looks attracted the hell out of me. I was about to step into a place I never thought I would go and more so never ever would want to buttttt he was something special.. something different. I literally began tryna find anything just to get a response from him. He was one of those one word people you know? The type that you can type a paragraph to in full detail and he'd be like “cool” or “okay”. It irked the shit out of me and I wanted to scream + punch him in the face! Everything in me told me to stop tryna push up on him.. that I just needed to back up BUT I just couldn't. Pretty soon a conversation involving a lot of other people but ending with me & him put me on to a side of him where I knew when I woke up the next morning I wanted to talk to him. I was hooked! Little by little ( well obvious as hell ) I was flirting with him every chance I got. And MANNN he straight up rejected me MANY TIMES! But it took him being in Vegas for 1 week for me to fall head over heels in love with him. I went from the girl who got chased to the one chasing and I loved every second of it. Even though the time I opened up and told him exactly how i'm feeling for him I got straight up rejected and it burned like hell but I had to take it. Cause I mean what if right then at that very moment I told myself I wasn't even gonna bother no more? There would be no us right now! What I'm tryna say from this is don't just accept anything coming your way. Work for the amazing things waiting for you. Cause in the end it'll all be worth it. Just look at me :] i'm shining!

i love you baby!
KD ♥

2/25/10

too legit to quit

I was awarded by my two lovely pumpkins Lala & Bri :]



(if you receive this award you can, (if you'd like,) put it in a post and say 2 of your favorite movies and then give it to as many people as you'd like!)

Favorite movies: of right now
- law abiding citizen
- the lovely bones

I AWARD!
jazzy
kya
lizzy
sylvia

2/22/10

you gotta long way to goooo.

RULES:
1. Put your iTunes, Windows Media Player, etc. on shuffle.


2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.


3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS.

4. Tag 6 friends.

5. Everyone tagged has to do the same thing.

6. Have Fun!

_______________


1. If someone asks "Are you okay?", you say?
LITTLE BIT - drake

2. How would you describe yourself?
FAMOUS GIRL - chris brown

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
I DO NOT HOOK UP - kelly clarkson

4. How do you feel today?
DITTO - cassie

5. What is your life's purpose?
ONE LESS LONELY GIRL - justin bieber

6. What is your motto?
APOLOGIZE - lil wayne

7. What do your friends think of you?
NEVER TOO LATE - hedley

8. What do you think about very often?
TONIGHTS THE NIGHT - blackstreet

9. What is 2+2?
PLEASE DON'T GO - tank

10. What do you think of your best friend?
IM GONE - jay sean

11. What is your life story?
FIREFLIES - owl city

12. What do you want to be when you grow up?
STILL STANDING - monica

13. What do you think when you see the person you like?
BEDROCK - lil wayne
( i really do tho! hahaha )

14. What will you dance to at your wedding?
25 REASONS - nivea

16. What is your hobby/interest?
SINGLE LADIES - beyonce

17. Whats your biggest fear?
PIMPIN ALL OVER THE WORLD - ludacris

18. What do you want right now?
HATE THAT I LOVE YOU - rihanna

19. What do you think of your (boy/girl)friend?
QUESTIONS - tamia

20. What is your favorite song??
ONE WISH - ray j

TAG; eveeeerryone :]

2/21/10

she rides that **** ;) and she handles her liquor! hahaha

FRIDAY NIGHT! Yes. We had no plans to go anywhere just basically me + my sister + steph = drunk times. In the house dancing to music and going on like were the hottest shit walking... you know? But around 1:00AM we got a sudden urge to go to a club well a bar ( which turned out to be like a club ) I was completely wasted so coming home to get ready was the hardest thing lol. I was stumbling everywhere and falling all over. Me drunk & tryna put on a pair of pants = NOT HAPPENING! I literally fell over like 3 times trying get them on! Anyway because we were wasted driving was no options so we hopped in a cab. Got there and there was a line up of people! The place was so packed that they weren't letting people in because they were over-capacitated! ANYWAYS for every 3 people our 1 was going in... bullshit right? But the bouncer was funny and cool and let us in because we were “pretty girls” :]. I'm not really a club or bar type person im more of a laid back house party or just chill type drinker but when we got in the music was amazing and we were just feeling it.. it coulda just been the liquor but whatever! We ended up having a big as debate about if dudes like squishy boobs or hard boobs which ended in madness! ROGER aka he's got a little retard in him ended up getting left behind by his friend ( some friend ) so all night he was like rolling with us lol which was awkward. We made friends with these 2 dudes one I already knew but the other one was tryna get my number way to hard hes all like “my names Wade you know like Dwayne Wade” lmfao! Not cute! A lot of other shit happened in between but I just cant remember it :]. lets just say next Friday a repeat!

131 / 365 *
21/365 *
i was being "artsy" for sugar lumpsss.

132 / 365 *
20/365 *
i didn't even notice the dead one! haha

133 / 365 *
21/365 *
memories made in the coldest winter.

134 / 365 *
20/365 *
kiara & jade, the loves of my life!

135 / 365 *
21/365 *
gotta support the canadians in the olympics.. or just love donuts :]

136 / 365 *
21/365 *
lights, camera, and a LITTLE just a LITTLE of ME :]

137 / 365 *
21/365 *
yes world, this is what liquor does to me :] i mean we all get a little crazy at times right?

2/15/10

Boyfriend TakeOver (My Question)

Everyday,

No Matter How mad she makes me

No Matter How corny i thinks she is

No Matter How much I think shes Over reacting about shit

No Matter How much she nags about things

I always ALWAYS ask her EVERYDAY the same question

"WHY ARE YOU SO PRETTY ??"



I Love You Baby.

2/14/10

racing against myself but I'm a couple steps behind


125 / 365 *
21/365 *

126 / 365 *
20/365 *

127 / 365 *
21/365 *

128 / 365 *
20/365 *

129 / 365 *
21/365 *

130 / 365 *
21/365 *

Today's my cousins Crystals birthday! I was planning to send her a text and call her but her random ass showed up at my house with Shawn! HAHA I look through the “peep hole” shit thingy on the door and I see fingers with smiley faces on them and OF COURSE I knew it was her because she always shows up with funky shit on her fingers! Haha it's cute though. Shes got a different face on every single finger LOL. Its her birthdaaaay! Also Happy birthday to Shadé she turned the big 23! party up girl! And take MORE than 5 shots damnit! HAHA :] suck it up for atleast tonight! Anddddddddddd the rest of you Happy Valentines Day!

diptych; two is better than one !

Okay so a few of you said to keep my blog the way I have it right now including my boyfriend. I think I've come to the conclusion on what I should do FOR NOW. Alright so basically everything's gonna remain the same but there will be times were I'll be focusing on just things to do with photography. Don't be surprised if every time you visit my blog or see a new entry its filled with pictures or something about it. That's just what I'm focusing on right now mainly to get better :]. I'm doing a few photography projects like different styles of pictures taking along with different styles of editing. I've been in love with diptych photography especially when it looks so natural and looks like it's meant to be :] so of course I tried a few of my own.

Diptych photography; two photos that fit better together than they did apart. A mini story in two frames, an association, siblings, parent & child, different perspectives on the same theme, anything that works well as a team of two.




2/12/10

excuse the random rant.

Honestly this is just a real random blog to pass the time. Im watching the new episode of Greys anatomy ( which is on commercial ) and i'm waiting for sugar lumps to get out the shower. We have a movie night planned ( The Lovely bones & The Fourth Kind ) I mean thats if he'd hurry his smelly ass up!

Here we go finally! I mean my blog of course its been in that “revamp” stage for way to long cause i had absolutely no idea what to do with it BUT here we go. I took a few of my 365 images and turned it into a header and I can say finally I'm happy with it :] ha! I have been rethinking my whole blog situation though.. its not like I wanna shut my blog down or anything because at this very moment that's the last thing I would do. I just have no clue if I should leave it the way I have it now or make it more photographyISH. Meaning posting nothing but photography and stuff along those lines. I would go the 2 blog route but I tried that before and one always got neglected so I merged them together AKA the birth of this blog. This really is a big ass dilemma for me lol honestly it may seem like a easy decision but I just don't know what to do. To keep blog the same or to “photographize” LOL :] hmmm

I've been doing a lot of what I was talking about wanting to do ( if that makes any sense ) i've gotten out and about to take more pictures and I wanted to do this for a while but I just have been feeling like shit lately and didn't have the energy in me to do so. By the way i'm loving the way the pictures are coming out pretty much amazing. My 365 is looking more “outsideISH” which is good ! Haha. The weather is real wet and messy but it's a good wet and messy! Speaking on 365 i'm looking to find more blogs who are doing the project I mean it's an amazing project and I love to see the layout of others peoples. This post is literally all over the place haha but its a good thing I guess.. I mean not really but whatever!

btwwww, formspring me !
http://www.formspring.me/amorkeys

2/8/10

have you ever tried sleeping with a broken heart...


120 / 365 *
21/365 *
121 / 365 *
20/365 *
122 / 365 *
21/365 *
123 / 365 *
20/365 *
124 / 365 *
21/365 *

2/6/10

525, 600 minutes.

How did I find the strength within me to go a full year without you by my side. How do I even find the words to explain how i'm feeling at this very moment? Because last year this day this very day you slipped away from me. It was the last day I heard your voice.. the last day I seen your face. It was the last day anything ever made sense to me. How can you THINK that by leaving me i'd be okay? I made the chose it was all my fault. I seen you hooked up to all these machines.. you were unable to breathe on your own.. you were in so much pain I had to tell them that enough was enough. But everyday I regret the decision I made. WHAT IFS cross my mind every single day. What if it was just pain temporarily? What if you could have got better but I took that chance away? I couldn't bare to see you in that pain so please understand that and forgive me if I took any chance away from you. But it haunts me everyday. People don't understand that losing your mother is the worst loss someone can face. They continuously tell me “its gonna be okay.. it'll get better over time” but no it wont. It never will. The pain will forever linger and never go away. Some days its stronger then others but its there every single day. I still feel you within me and I believe your by my side when I'm faced with tough situations. I know holding regrets is only gonna make everything worse and you shouldn't do it but I do. I regret so much! I regret having the chance to forgive you the right way. Everyone deserves seconds chances and in your case I should have known to give you as many chances as you needed because I knew the choices you made and chose to live with where gonna come back to you.

You've hurt me to a point where I was in unbearable pain from how hard I was crying to find it in me to forgive you. Like how am I suppose to feel? My whole life living with you has been nothing but pain. You chose drugs over your own daughter and left me with my father who was nothing but abusive and you KNEW IT. I grew up so fucked up with so much pain and anger within me all because you felt the need that your addiction was more important than your only child. What did I do to be pushed away? But all I ever wanted was you to love me unconditionally that's all. I never asked for anything else but to feel the love of my own mother and the only time I ever felt that was with you on your death bed. When every wrong decision you made was staring back at you.. That was the only time you understood all the wrong you have done and how much you hurt me. I remember EVERYTHING you have ever done to leave a bruise on my heart and as much as I want to just push it aside I can't.. I just can't. As sad as it is for me to say...... I would let you do it all over again just to have you in my life. I would stand on the line and let you burn me over and over again if that would mean you'd be around and not even physically in my life because you never were but just having the thought of you around is enough. I can't even write no more...

It's been a year.
You're gone and never coming back.
I love you...............

A-Z of me.

tagged by lala

A - AVAILABLE: nope! madly in love.
B - BIRTHDAY: july 2nd.
C - CRUSHING ON: sugar lumps!
D - DRINK YOU LAST HAD: ginger ale.
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: boyfraan sugar lumps! of course
F - FAVORITE SONG : too many to name
G - GUMMY BEARS OR GUMMY WORMS: wormsss
H - HOMETOWN: kingston, JAMAICA
I - IN LOVE WITH: boyfraan aka sugar lumps aka DELL.
J - JUGGLE: faaaaail.
K - KILLED SOMEONE: wouldn't you like to know ;)
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: uhhh idk.
M- MILKSHAKE FLAVOR: vanilla
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 3 ( that i consider )
O - ONE WISH: to hug.. seee.. touch.. speak to her one last time......
P - PERSON YOU TALKED TO LAST: alisha.
R - REASON TO SMILE: boyfraaan
S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: wait till you see my smile
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP: 915AM
U - UNDERWEAR COLOR: black
W - WORST HABIT: caring TOO much.
X - X-RAYS YOU’VE HAD: oh man.. TOO many.
Y - YOYOS: pass.
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: cancer
i tag you all :]

PS,
i added some links to the sidebar AND also i made a formspring.. late i know :] but better late then never right? anywho .. ask away!
http://www.formspring.me/amorkeys

2/5/10

here's to good eats

I'm finally tacking my biggest problem which is eating unhealthy. Considering the fact that its so convenient to grab a burger and go or a bag of chips makes it hard especially if your always on the go. Not only from this am I feeling like shit at the end of the day with absolutely no energy but I AM gaining weight. Don't get me wrong I'm not a diet or anything like that I'm just completely changing my eating habits to feel better. I ate burger king about 2 days ago and got a touch of food poisoning I shouldn't even say a touch considering it had me hugging the toilet all night and in unbearable pain. I was recommended to drink nothing but clear fluids and when my body can handle those fine to move on to small food like bread.. rice.. etc. what else is new right? Always something going wrong ! But then again all the more reason to start my healthy shit. Anyways I went grocery shopping yesterday and spent a total of $32 but really got my moneys worth considering buying healthy is kinda expensive. I just got the basics but I'll be buying little buy little :] the main thing I'm gonna love about eating healthy is the fact that you just feel so much cleaner and better! So anyways here I goooooo! :]


[ apple juice . salad dressing .buns . pita bread . lettuce . cauliflower . pears . apples . tomatoes . carrots . cucumber . broccoli . garlic . jello . turkey meat . croutons . thin crackers . special k bars . and a roast! ]